I have been really angry with my mother-in-law. Really, really angry. I won't go into the reasons here, but trust me when I say that, if you are a sane and rational person with some sense of fair-play, you would be angry too. But there are a few things I need to remember. For days, my head has been so clouded by my rage that I have been unable to see them. But right now, there is a small break in the clouds, just the smallest hint of sunshine, and I don't want to forget these thoughts that have broken through.
- My anger gives her power. The more I let it take me over, the more she screws up my life. The only person that hurts is me.
- My husband is a good person, who is trying his best in a really terrible situation, and my anger is only making things harder for him. He has a right to grieve for his father, without that grief being all mixed up in bitter feelings created by me.
- Good things come to those who wait. It is a cliche, but I need to trust that things will be made right in the fullness of time. No, they are not right now. But that is how life works. We trust that we can survive each trial and, in time, we learn that it has made us stronger.
- I have made my point, and I can let it rest now. I tend to worry that my husband doesn't understand how strongly I feel about this, that he will let his instincts to please his mother take over, that he loves her more than he loves me and our daughter and the values that we hold. But he has made it clear to me where his heart lies, and that he understands my feelings, and I need to let it rest. I need to trust him.